Alleviate

Today was wayyyy lame. I woke up not feeling well so I thought I shouldn't go snowboarding... I spent most of the day working on my English paper due next week... It sucked, I am really not very good at writing formal papers. My free writing is award winning though.. hahaha, good times with the academic team in high school. I miss those days. I had an interview-ish thing this morning with The Living Scriptures... a company that sell videos about the scriptures and historical figures and stuff. It seems like it will be pretty cool if I get to do it. I would spend the summer in Phoenix, which doesn't really thrill me, it will be so hot!! But I would be able to go see Taralyn and Brenda and Makenna!! That would be pretty sweet. And this job would really supplement my mission, I really have a way to go financially for that. The only thing that bugs me about this is that they want me to choose between doing it, and doing EFY. Financially, it's obvious, but this may be my only chance to ever experience what EFY is. Oh well. I'll figure it out. I was talking to my dad about it... minus the mission stuff... and all he said was to go where the money was, which is obviously with the Living Scriptures. He wasn't all supportive like usual, but then it wasn't his fault. I felt like an insensitive jerk. He told me a guy that he has grown up with, someone that had been in our lives since I was born, he was always around when I lived in Chicago, was killed. He was the same age as my dad, barely under 43. It scares me to death to. I want my dad so much to move away from there. It's not even Chicago, it's just where he lives. It's still no good... so dangerous. A step up sure from where I grew up at, but still not good.
It is a weird night tonight too... last night and tonight I have spent relatively little time with the guys. It was pretty weird. Like today, all I have seen of them was we all went out to eat at Burger King, and they went to play DDR and now here I am, writing. I'm not so much a fan of DDR anyways. It's fun to watch.. but playing it in these apartments gets a little nuts. Nights like tonight I really miss Jessie and Shawnna. It seems like tonight would be the night we would end up running around town with pirate hats from Long Johns and a nerf ball. Or perhaps, slingshots and gummi bears? It is untelling. Or even last semester with Jessie and everyone here, a Horkleys run and a movie or flaming tennis balls or something. We were always doing something fun.
I watched The Testaments today for the first time really. We watched it at Blakes last sunday, but everyone talked through it so I didn't really get to watch it. There was a part at the end, where Christ healed Helams blindness so he could see him, everyone last week said that this part would make anyone cry. I wonder why I don't cry? It is strange. I puddle, but very very seldom do I ever actually cry. I can after all count the number of times I've cried in nearly twenty years on my hands, including funerals... I should probably have therapy or something. Eh well. It's not that big of a deal I guess. Just something that I wonder about. It's like Cameron Diaz in the movie The Holiday. Her character really couldn't cry either, even though she really wanted too. Strange. But thats me eh? Well enough of that. I think I've said all I have to say for today.
Just kidding, I was just listening to Snow Patrol's The Finish Line, a line said, "Insect noise is all I hear" I miss that about Kentucky. The frogs and crickets at night, natures chorus, a lullaby putting anyone into a state of serenity. I miss laying on my deck at night and looking at the night sky. It is so beautiful. Or laying in the tall grass at Orion and Gemini through the trees. I could even see mars a time or two. Everyone should get to experience that. It's one of those moments I recall feeling really alive!